Science tells us that relationships are up to 85% of our happiness. So, if you want to be happy and successful, pay attention to how connected you are with the people you work with, live with and love.
To improve relationships, practice compassion.
Compassion is the subject of “The Book of Joy” by his Holiness the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu with Douglas Abrams.
Compassion – for self and others – leads to joy. So, whoever is bugging you has something within them that reminds you of your humanity. There is something there, in them, that is also present in you. You are more alike than different.
When you see that, ‘Just like me, they can be impatient,’ your insight allows you to relax.
Or, ‘Oh, they are frustrated by their heavy workload as well,’ helps you be more accepting.
Practicing compassion creates calm, connection and peace. By changing the voice in your head, the one telling you they are wrong, to ‘They get challenged just like me, they want to be happy just like me,’ you can connect (with yourself and others) and be peaceful.
Next step? State the obvious: “I see you are frustrated with…” then listen or offer to help.
Or just change your energy. Pause, breathe and smile and think, ‘I choose peace.’ Stop pushing against what is happening and accept (with compassion) that you are challenged.
And, accept that they are challenged.
If you still can’t accept their behavior or the situation, accept that you can’t accept it. This will bring you peace.
Remember, you are in this together.