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How To Set Yourself Free

What are you struggling to let go of?

Title card with "How to Set Yourself Free - Letting Go In Order to Be Successful" written on the right hand side. To the left, there is an image with team members hands stacked on top of each other in the middle of a circle to indicate teamwork.


Are you aware of the critical voice that interferes with your happiness and peace?

Start to notice that voice and what it is “saying” about you and others.

It blames and complains, it sees what is “wrong,” versus what is true, what is working.


That negative self-talk lowers your self-esteem, interferes with your work and relationships, and limits your confidence.


How do you get it to stop? Start with forgiveness.


Here’s the twist though: the first person you need to forgive is yourself.


For me, one of the most painful things I had to forgive myself for involved my sweet, wonderful brother.

Danny was a Special Olympian who lived in a group home in New York most of his life.

I lived in Philadelphia and South Carolina during that time. I didn’t see him very often.


When he died 10 years ago, I had to make peace with myself.

I thought, “Paula, you saw him as often as you could; you did the best you could at the time; let it go.”


Painful? Difficult? You bet.

A necessary step to live a happy, healthy life? Absolutely.


When we become more self-aware and look at the tough stuff - those thoughts and feelings that stand in the way of our happiness - we grow.

This growth strengthens our relationship with ourselves, and with people at home and work.


The result? Deeper connections, allowing us to experience more joy and do better work.


How to begin?

Ask, “What do I need to forgive myself for today?


Recall the incident and recognize what you have been saying to yourself about it.


If your self-talk has been negative, ask, “How can I see this with self-compassion, knowing I was responding based upon the knowledge, experience and understanding I had at that time?”


This re-frame frees you from the guilt and negativity that surrounds blaming yourself.


Understand that you were doing your best.

You can choose to let it go now.


If you choose to let it go say, “I forgive myself and set myself free.”


This is how you feel better, with just a thought that shifts your perspective.

The re-frame gives you the peace you deserve.


This is how you set yourself free.


Paula’s leadership training transforms your company’s culture into a place that engages and retains top talent, saving millions. Her clients include Coca-Cola, Lowe’s, Microsoft, KPMG and Collins Aerospace.

Paula Guilfoyle

Paula Guilfoyle

Training Leaders to Be Resilient

Phone: (704) 906-8045


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